It's hard to believe it's been a year since my due date. Still feels like I heard the words "no heartbeat" just weeks ago. Oh how I wish I were celebrating your 1st birthday, my precious one. Jesus, please give my baby a big hug from me!
How was it to be that I now am robbed of such joy?
Of watching you grow or finding out if you’re a girl or boy.
Never did I get to hear your cries or even see your tears,
Or kiss your little brow and hug away your fears.
I am just left here now with pain and few memories,
Of the days that were happy with you inside of me.
For you were loved and wanted oh so much,
What I would give just to have felt your touch.
The hours crawl by yet the time does not seem to slow,
I want to scream out to the world you are gone, why don’t they know?
How is the world still turning when I feel it should have stopped?
Why are people laughing and living when it feels like I can not?
Not enough tears can be shed to express the love I have for you,
No words can describe what I all wanted to be able to do.
I would have just held you and breathed in your sweet smell,
Shouted with joy and phoned all the people I wanted to tell.
But this time I called loved ones with the sad sad news,
That too little were you to live among us and I was meant to lose.
But nothing will ever erase those twelve weeks we had together,
For a piece of my heart you now hold always and forever.
