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I remember a day when I had joy.  I remember a time when I had hope.   Lately, I feel lost.  I understand the concept that I'm the clay being formed by the potter.  However, the process is long and very difficult.  What about the verse that says the joy of the Lord is your strength?  I must be missing something.  Where is the joy .. and the strength?  I keep plugging along. It's not like I have a choice.   If I did, I would choose health.  I am not adept at fighting.  I am weak and frail.  The fatigue - insurmountable.  I know the Holy Spirit intercedes for you.. but does He fight for you?  I hope so.

I ran across this poem today.  Feels like it was written just for me.

God in Heaven
How my heart aches
I get smashed to pieces
Until my spirit breaks

Feeling like this
Is unbearable to me
I can’t handle pain like this
Not to this degree

I know You’re trying
To make me a better person
I look for the light
But things only worsen

I don’t understand
Why You gave me life
When I would live
With so much strife

Oh God in Heaven
I can’t take it any longer
Even though I know
This will make me stronger

When I’m feeling like this
It’s too hard to see
That You’re trying to make
A better me